All the news that is news...

So, here's a couple of random thoughts for you this morning:

First off, here's something that SHOULD be in the news:

http://www.bbc.com/autos/story/20161117-you-may-have-to-pay-for-an-overhead-bin

I know, the bit about the extra charges for overhead bin use and the fat taxes for larger airline passengers is awful. But read down a bit and you come across this nugget:

Not only are fizzy drinks capable of rotting teeth, they can also remove rust. One Latvian grandfather decided to put cola to the ultimate rust-removal test by submerging his car in a pool of Coca-Cola. In a video posted online, the unnamed daredevil grandad fills a lined pit with 6,000 two-litre bottles of Coke. He then settles into the driver’s seat and speeds into the hole, smashing the front of his red Audi. Whether or not the rust was removed is unknown, but the Daily Mail contends that “improvement in the amount of rust on the car was more than outweighed by the damage to the vehicle.”

Brilliant. Bravo, I say. Well done, BBC, in bringing us the news that really matters. Even if you stole it from the Daily Mail, it's still absolutely worthy.

Next, I'd like to comment on Google AdSense. So, this is that program where Google puts ads on your site in order to give you a little extra cash. I'd heard about this, and my blogger dashboard encourages me to contemplate this feature. So I thought I'd give it a shot.

Turns out, Google has some pretty strict policies regarding whose sites they deign to put their precious, precious ads on. Here's the response I got from the algorithm-generated review:

	Your AdSense application status

	Thank you for your interest in Google AdSense. Unfortunately, after reviewing your application, we're unable to accept you into AdSense at this time. We did not approve your application for the reasons listed below. Site does not comply with Google policies: We're unable to approve your AdSense application at this time because your site does not comply with the Google AdSense program policies or adhere to the Webmaster Quality guidelines. It's our goal to provide our advertisers sites that offer rich and meaningful content, receive organic traffic, and allow us to serve well-targeted ads to users. We believe that currently your site does not fulfill this criteria. Here are some recommendations to help you improve the user experience on your site and comply with AdSense criteria:  It’s important for sites displaying Google ads to offer significant value to the user. As a publisher, you must provide unique and relevant content that gives users a reason to visit your site first. Don’t place ads on auto-generated pages or pages with little to no original content. Your site should also provide a good user experience through clear navigation and organization. Users should be able to easily click through your pages and find the information they’re seeking. --------------------- You can find more details and application tips in this help article. To update and resubmit your application, please visit google.com/adsense and sign in using the email address and password you submitted with your application. Our specialists will review your account for compliance with our program policies, so please make sure to resolve all of the issues listed above before resubmitting. For a complete list of AdSense criteria, please visit the AdSense program policies and AdSense Terms and Conditions. For more information, visit our Help Center or search the AdSense Help Forum, where a community of publishers shares AdSense best practices. Representatives of Google AdSense also participate in discussions.

Sincerely, The Google AdSense Team

So what I'd like to know is, what actually DOES meet the criteria? And how is this determined? According to the statement above, the goal is to "provide our advertisers sites that offer rich and meaningful content, receive organic traffic, and allow us to serve well-targeted ads to users." Let's look at each of those statements relative to my blog.

1. Rich and meaningful content offered. Well, you're here, right? You've read some of my blog. Rich and meaningful content? I think that's a definite and unequivocal YES.

2. Organic traffic. I have absolutely no idea what this means. Organic meaning biological? Or possessing of internal organs? Or only organs need apply (Wurlitzer, you're OK; Steinway, you're out...)? Or does it mean "organic" in the new-agey, business speak meaning traffic that comes from a variety of unrelated sources? Yeah, probably that. Still. Stupid and poorly written standard.

3. Well-targeted ad service. Again, I don't know what this means. My blog tends to be pretty random and as such perhaps not well-targeted to a specific market. Boy would Marx have a field day with that concept. But I've got over 1300 posts that span 8 1/2 years worth of rambling. You'd think that would count for something, and you'd think that the algorithms at Google could piece together some kind of pattern in all of that (shucks they can give you 2.85 million returns in 0.47 seconds on the words "baseball glove") and target ads to those folks. But maybe that's the rub - I'm TOO random. If I were writing about the woes of diaper changing as a single dad who lived in the Bay Area and who compared different brands of diapers, maybe that's better targeting. I'm too all over the place, too inconsistent for an ad. But again, Marx would have a field day with that.

Welp. I guess I shouldn't complain. They offer this service for free (Thanks, Google!) and it hasn't cost me a dime over the years to write my totally random, awkward, wonderful thoughts. And you haven't had to scroll past ads that would otherwise interrupt your reading pleasure. So, never mind Google AdSense. You can keep your money and ads.