I'm a bit cranky this morning. So I've decided to write the top ten reasons why I'm glad to be leaving Texas:
1. Ted Cruz, Ron Paul, and Rick Perry. I almost feel like I don't need to elaborate on this. I will be happy to get someplace where the folks who represent me nationally and in the state are more closely aligned with rational, coherent, intelligent thought.
2. Mosquitoes. I went to my daughter's open house last night and got five mosquito bites. Five. Indoors. No me gusta. There are mosquitoes all year round here.
3. Hurricanes. Yeah, perhaps this doesn't need any explanation either. This year has been light, but that doesn't mean it hasn't been worrisome.
4. Food. This may sound weird, because southern cooking is typically associated with comfort and satiety. Six years of southern cooking is too much, though. I need a salad.
5. Heat. It starts getting hot here around Valentine's Day. It stays hot until Veteran's Day. You just sweat. ALL THE TIME. It's annoying, and I won't miss it.
6. Schools. TAKS becomes STARR becomes something else... Legislators telling teachers how to do their jobs because they don't trust them. No teacher's union to fight back. It's ridiculous. And it's stupid. And it damages our future because children suffer.
7. Petrochemical smells. I don't know what it is I'm smelling, but I'm pretty sure it's not good for me.
8. Ignorance is not always bliss. Seriously, folks... Pick up a newspaper. There is a whole world out there, and you're missing it. And no, that's not a good thing, despite the delusional head-in-the-sand attitude.
9. Bigness. Everything in Texas is big. Sometimes I think that's a good thing, but often it's just downright annoying - big hair, big trucks, big guns, big attitudes, and big egos. It's hard to be reverent when it's so darn loud. Plus, it takes 20 minutes just to get anywhere.
10. Rednecks with money. People driving a golf cart around the neighborhood (with extra lights and a gun rack) because they're too lazy to walk. Four wheelers in the drainage ditches. Huge, loud, obnoxious trucks with enormous car-crushing tires. Anti-Obama attitudes (which, I acknowledge, are not limited to Texas, but it's particularly onerous when I am surrounded by it all the time and it feels so institutionalized here - I mean, come on, folks. He's the PRESIDENT. Get over it).
I will write the top ten things I'm going to miss about Texas tomorrow. Maybe. If I can come up with ten.
(I did warn you I was cranky).
1. Ted Cruz, Ron Paul, and Rick Perry. I almost feel like I don't need to elaborate on this. I will be happy to get someplace where the folks who represent me nationally and in the state are more closely aligned with rational, coherent, intelligent thought.
2. Mosquitoes. I went to my daughter's open house last night and got five mosquito bites. Five. Indoors. No me gusta. There are mosquitoes all year round here.
3. Hurricanes. Yeah, perhaps this doesn't need any explanation either. This year has been light, but that doesn't mean it hasn't been worrisome.
4. Food. This may sound weird, because southern cooking is typically associated with comfort and satiety. Six years of southern cooking is too much, though. I need a salad.
5. Heat. It starts getting hot here around Valentine's Day. It stays hot until Veteran's Day. You just sweat. ALL THE TIME. It's annoying, and I won't miss it.
6. Schools. TAKS becomes STARR becomes something else... Legislators telling teachers how to do their jobs because they don't trust them. No teacher's union to fight back. It's ridiculous. And it's stupid. And it damages our future because children suffer.
7. Petrochemical smells. I don't know what it is I'm smelling, but I'm pretty sure it's not good for me.
8. Ignorance is not always bliss. Seriously, folks... Pick up a newspaper. There is a whole world out there, and you're missing it. And no, that's not a good thing, despite the delusional head-in-the-sand attitude.
9. Bigness. Everything in Texas is big. Sometimes I think that's a good thing, but often it's just downright annoying - big hair, big trucks, big guns, big attitudes, and big egos. It's hard to be reverent when it's so darn loud. Plus, it takes 20 minutes just to get anywhere.
10. Rednecks with money. People driving a golf cart around the neighborhood (with extra lights and a gun rack) because they're too lazy to walk. Four wheelers in the drainage ditches. Huge, loud, obnoxious trucks with enormous car-crushing tires. Anti-Obama attitudes (which, I acknowledge, are not limited to Texas, but it's particularly onerous when I am surrounded by it all the time and it feels so institutionalized here - I mean, come on, folks. He's the PRESIDENT. Get over it).
I will write the top ten things I'm going to miss about Texas tomorrow. Maybe. If I can come up with ten.
(I did warn you I was cranky).
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