I never understood why it was so difficult for members of the bishopric to get up and share their testimony... In my last ward, it was kind of a thing that they just didn't seem to relish. Now I think I know why. Something about knowing you're going to have to share your testimony on demand is a little daunting. Usually, back in my comfortable and peaceful pew sitting days, I was in awe of the men who spoke. They seemed to really know what to say and how to say it. I never gave much thought to the idea that they had known this was coming for months and were anticipating (dreading) it. Oh, well. It was my turn yesterday.
I think part of the problem comes from an inferiority complex. In our Church, we are not professional speakers (most of us, that is - some are!) and yet we have heard incredible speakers all our lives. We hear people speak from the heart. We hear people give fiery testimony. We hear people moved to tears by the tender feelings they are sharing. We hear monologues about travels in foreign countries. We hear (in detail) some of the most intimate things of people's lives (some of which we didn't really NEED to hear)... And all of this is somehow sublime and perfect in it's organic and earthy way. It feels good. It feels right.
But when you are scheduled to do it (usually, testimonies are given when you feel impressed or good about doing so) the task takes on a whole new meaning. First, you are expected to come up with something interesting and new. Regardless of whether that is there or not. It also must be spiritually uplifting. It must further set the tone of the meeting, focusing people on Christ and gospel things, and oh, yeah - if you can be mildly funny without offending anyone, that's good, too...
I am not (really!) afraid or shy or embarrassed to stand in front of people. That was beaten out of me in architecture school. But this, for some reason is nerve racking and tense.
All that said, I think yesterday went pretty well. Several people even referenced the things I had said when they shared their testimonies, so perhaps that's a good sign. At least they were listening...
I think part of the problem comes from an inferiority complex. In our Church, we are not professional speakers (most of us, that is - some are!) and yet we have heard incredible speakers all our lives. We hear people speak from the heart. We hear people give fiery testimony. We hear people moved to tears by the tender feelings they are sharing. We hear monologues about travels in foreign countries. We hear (in detail) some of the most intimate things of people's lives (some of which we didn't really NEED to hear)... And all of this is somehow sublime and perfect in it's organic and earthy way. It feels good. It feels right.
But when you are scheduled to do it (usually, testimonies are given when you feel impressed or good about doing so) the task takes on a whole new meaning. First, you are expected to come up with something interesting and new. Regardless of whether that is there or not. It also must be spiritually uplifting. It must further set the tone of the meeting, focusing people on Christ and gospel things, and oh, yeah - if you can be mildly funny without offending anyone, that's good, too...
I am not (really!) afraid or shy or embarrassed to stand in front of people. That was beaten out of me in architecture school. But this, for some reason is nerve racking and tense.
All that said, I think yesterday went pretty well. Several people even referenced the things I had said when they shared their testimonies, so perhaps that's a good sign. At least they were listening...
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