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For my daughter...

This is a lily.

Specifically, it's a tiger lily. I took this picture this morning while I was thinking of you. Everything that is beautiful makes me think of you.

But this morning, this lily made me think of you for several reasons. This tiger lily may not want to be a tiger lily. It may look at the day lilies we have growing nearby and think - it would be nice to be like that: tall, attractive, whatever. I don't know if lilies are jealous of other flowers the way people sometimes are. But regardless of what it may think it wants to be, the tiger lily cannot change what it is.

So this one just carries on being the most beautiful thing ever.

Is there any question why this would remind me of you?

We live in a world where people are going to try to force you to conform. They do this in many ways, both subtle and obvious, but all equally painful and demeaning. It's not fair, and it's certainly not right. But it will happen. My wish for you is to be the tiger lily, and be beautiful because you're a tiger lily, and not the day lily at all.

The world may also try to crush your spirit. I really don't know why the world cares so much about young women like this. It would seem better that we could celebrate the strong, independent, and intelligent young women of the world, glory in their individuality and unspeakable worth, and bolster their sense of strength and character. But in my experience, this is not the case.

Please, do not let this happen to you.

Frankly, I don't think it will. I've watched you grow into an incredible person, and I see how you think and feel and love and learn. It can be lonely at times, trying to be this woman, this lovely, strong, independent woman. Independence, by it's very nature, can preclude many of the social interactions you may think you want - especially when you look at others and their "good times" that they appear to be having. When I think of those "good times" I think of a dog playing with a ball or stick, or chasing its own tail. Sure looks like fun, but in general these "good times" are fleeting, vapid, and unsatisfying. Independent people are not anti-social, they just know that they're not reliant on others for their "good times" or their sense of fulfillment. You're the tiger lily, reaching for the sun and the light in your own way. Do this, and you'll be surprised that there are many, many others like you who also reach for the sun. These people won't be a burden to you as you reach. Their reaching will enhance your own.

There are things that happen in the world that are beyond capacity to understand or relate to. I wish I understood any better. I don't. I don't have any advice to give when hurts or frustrations or suffering comes. I wish that it would not, and yet, I know that it will. But perhaps, maybe, it's the stormy weather that provides the rain in which the tiger lilies can grow. And if we are patient, we will walk in the sun again. Remember that  even if the sun isn't visible due to the clouds, it still shines on. Don't stop wondering, questioning, exploring, pushing... Discouragements and setbacks are just opportunities for more excellent, more diligent effort. And YOU WILL OVERCOME.

The wonderful thing about the lily is that it grows brightly for a season, and when the cold comes it does not die, but retreats for a while into the roots/bulb, only to return even brighter and healthier and stronger when the sun comes again.

You are beautiful. You are glorious and radiant. You shine with such light and warmth. Even if you don't always see it, it's there. Do not ever be afraid to shine.

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