The Sublime Roundabout

I was a good kid I wouldn't do you no harm I was a nice kid With a nice paper round Forgive me any pain I may have brung to you With God's help I know I'll always be near to you But Jesus hurt me When he deserted me, but I have forgiven Jesus For all the desire He placed in me when there's nothing I can do With this desire  I was a good kid Through hail and snow I'd go Just to moon you I carried my heart in my hand Do you understand? Do you understand? But Jesus hurt me When he deserted me, but I have forgiven Jesus For all of the love He placed in me When there's no-one I can turn to with this love  Monday - humiliation  Tuesday - suffocation  Wednesday - condescension  Thursday - is pathetic  By Friday life has killed me  By Friday life has killed me  (Oh pretty one, Oh pretty one) Why did you give me So much desire? When there is nowhere I can go To offload this desire And why did you give me So much lo...

Fifty years of dreaming. We're not where we want to be, but we're getting there. Thank you for the inspiration, Dr. King.

I've been following with some interest the events taking place in Syria. I don't like the way things are shaping up. It was easier to understand before the chemical weapons were used. Now, it's gone to a whole new and unpleasant level. Not that war is ever pleasant, mind. But weapons of mass destruction? The use of those kinds of weapons is just beyond the pale. I know. The US dropped the bomb on Hiroshima and Nagasaki. I know about the incendiary bombs used in WWII and subsequent conflicts. I know about the Agent Orange and napalm and all the rest. I also know that the US is one of the few countries on earth that still hasn't signed the landmine treaty. I also acknowledge the fact that a couple of young men piloting a drone from thousands of miles away can deliver weapons on target in a way that jeopardizes only the targets (and those unfortunates who happen to be in the area). That last one bothers me in a way that none of the rest do, frankly. There's just some...

The reduction of the universe to the compass of a single being, and the extension of a single being until it reaches God - that is love. Love is the salute of the angels to the stars. How sad the heart is when the rendered sad by love! How great is the void created by the absence of the being who alone fills the world. How true it is that the beloved becomes God. It is understandable that God would grow jealous if the Father of All Things had not so evidently created all things for the soul, and the soul for love. It needs no more than a smile, glimpsed beneath a hat of white crepe adorned with lilac, for the soul to be transported into the palace of dreams. God is behind all things, but all things conceal God. Objects are black and human creatures are opaque. To love a person is to render them transparent. There are thoughts which are prayers. There are moments when, whatever the posture of the body, the soul is on its knees. Separated lovers cheat absence by a thousand ...

1 (A Psalm of David.) The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. 2 He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters. 3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake. 4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me. 5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over. 6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever. Psalm 23

I hear the drizzle of the rain Like a memory it falls Soft and warm continuing Tapping on my roof and walls. And from the shelter of my mind Through the window of my eyes I gaze beyond the rain-drenched streets To England where my heart lies. My mind's distracted and diffused My thoughts are many miles away They lie with you when you're asleep And kiss you when you start your day. And as a song I was writing is left undone I don't know why I spend my time Writing songs I can't believe With words that tear and strain to rhyme. And so you see I have come to doubt All that I once held as true I stand alone without beliefs The only truth I know is you. And as I watch the drops of rain Weave their weary paths and die I know that I am like the rain There but for the grace of you go I. - Paul Simon I lay in bed, awake. Tears stream unchecked across my cheeks, down through unshaven stubble and onto my pillow. I weep silently, full of pain and so...

“...Nobody knows like a woman how to say things that are both sweet and profound. Sweetness and depth, this is all of woman; this is Heaven.”  - Victor Hugo

Numbers are interesting. Here are some fun number facts related to my life: 10-29-1974. My birthday. I was born 7 weeks early. My mother was in labor with me for 36 hours, which is more time than the doctor gave me to live. I'm now into my 38th year; I have lived 14,175 days as of today. I am 2 of seven children, 1 of 4 brothers, and I have 3 sisters. 1992. The year I graduated from high school. I was 17 years old. 2 weeks later I entered boot camp in San Diego. My company number was 053. I was there a total of 9 weeks. While I was there, there was an earthquake that measured 7.3. It happened just before 5 AM on Sunday morning. There were 69 other men in my boot camp company. My boot camp number was 12. 12 was also the number of the apartment Youngshin and I lived in when we were in Michigan. 1996 is the year I got married. 1997 is the year Ammon was born. He just turned 16. 2002 was the year Elise was born. She just turned 11. Youngshin was born in 1966, although her birth...

What is love, she asked. How do you know? Is it a feeling? An action? A surrender? A victory? Is it hope? Is it a struggle? Does it prompt or motivate? Is it found in the breathless kiss in the night? Is it in the hand held alongside the deathbed?  In the daily struggle for survival? Is it something you feel alone? Or is it something you can only feel together? He just smiled and looked in her eyes And said I love you.

I have many things coming up in my life, things of importance and significance. Some of them affect only me, while others affect the people I love most. I don't have a crystal ball or goat entrails to catch glimpses of the future. All I have to go by is my past experience and my hopes for the future. My career is on the verge of taking a potentially interesting turn, both geographically and with regard to promotion and advancement. I don't like change any more than the next person. I like to feel comfortable in my surroundings, my position, my life. I like feeling secure and stable and in control.  And yet... and yet...... Control is seldom more than an illusion anyway. Suppose I were in a car accident on my way home this evening... paralyzed and infirm forever. (God forbid). How would that change the way I live? How would I react? What would I do differently? What would my priorities be then? Things that were once so concrete and simple would instantly and irrevocably beco...

Sunlight Darkness Mercy Justice Health Sickness Close Distant Warm Cold Passion Apathy Until death do us part For time and all eternity Despair Hope

I love you I want you I need you You are for me And I am for you Words I long to hear Words I long to say Whispered Like golden tendrils From the heart From the soul

"We need not say to you that the floodgates of our hearts were lifted and our eyes were a fountain of tears, but those who have not been enclosed in the walls of prison without cause or provocation, can have but little idea how sweet the voice of a friend is; one token of friendship from any source whatever awakens and calls into action every sympathetic feeling . . . until finally all enmity, malice and hatred, and past differences, misunderstandings and mismanagements are slain victorious at the feet of hope; and when the heart is sufficiently contrite, then the voice of inspiration steals along and whispers, 'My son, peace be unto thy soul; thine adversity and thine afflictions shall be but a small moment; and then if thou endure it well, God shall exalt thee on high; thou shalt triumph over all thy foes.'" - Joseph Smith

This is one of my all time favorite Beatles charts. Paul sounds great on this, very much like he would through the 70s with Wings. It's also reminiscent of his work on other love ballads, like Yesterday, Hey Jude, Let It Be, etc. He's great at the emotional connection. I've also linked an Alison Krauss cover, because I think it's lovely.

There are a few drawbacks to living in southeast Texas. Among the more significant includes hurricane season. No me gusta.  I have the National Hurricane Center website bookmarked - have for years - and I am a bit obsessive about it. Of course, it's all in the name of keeping myself prepared for the eventual/inevitable. But it's nerve racking.  http://www.nhc.noaa.gov/gtwo_atl.shtml  Right now there are a couple of areas of interest, one in the Caribbean and one out off the coast of Africa. The one in the Caribbean is headed north west towards the Yucatan Peninsula and then into the Bay of Campeche. After that it's still too early to tell. The waters in the Gulf are very warm - nearly 90 degrees (!) - so it would appear conducive to storm formation. The one off the coast of Africa is at least a week and a half away, and therefore more susceptible to turns to the north out over the open Atlantic. The high pressure ridge that forms over the Atlantic this time of y...

The coldest dark night Though desperately long and lone Yields to the new dawn

Sometimes there's nothing better than a little butt rock. Thanks, Metallica.

com·ple·men·ta·ry adjective \ˌkäm-plə-ˈmen-t(ə-)rē\  Definition of COMPLEMENTARY 1 : relating to or constituting one of a pair of contrasting colors that produce a neutral color when combined in suitable proportions 2 : serving to fill out or complete 3 : mutually supplying each other's lack Sapphire and rose gold Deepest azure blue and the sun's blazing corona Royal blue and vibrant orange Blueberries and golden honey Blue jeans and a bright yellow shirt Deep oceans draped with golden morning clouds Velvety blue-black of night while glowing sparks float up from firelight Me. And You.

She really is the most beautiful thing in the world.

Yep.

I do this silly online poll thing. It's completely random, but I enjoy it. The website is correlated.org, if you'd like to check it out. The premise is that they ask random questions and then draw correlations between what you've answered in the past and what you've answered to the current poll. The thing is fraught with interesting poll-taking issues, but it's never purported to be anything other than silly random fun. Take today's poll for example: In general, 41 percent of people say they'd rather have a flamingo than a giraffe as their wisecracking sidekick in an otherwise realistic movie about their life. But among those who dislike cotton candy, 55 percent would rather have a flamingo. Based on a survey of 111 people who don't like cotton candy and 364 people total. I mean, yeah. Totally random. But silly and fun... One of the other things they allow you to do - if you're a geek and have been around for a while doing these polls, like ...

It's a dark and stormy evening here in southeast Texas. I don't like storms. They are harsh and threatening and frightening. And they are out of control. And, like most people, I crave a modicum of control.

Life is... um... interesting. You find out quickly who your friends are when you have hard things to go through. Those who stand by you, those who love you - in spite of you... Those who walk in when everyone else walks out. And those who give you space when you need it, too. Our new dog Martha has been sick. It's not clear how it's happening, but her skin has become very irritated and painful. She's been to the doctor and has had it checked out. Now we just need to give her some time to heal. It's painful to know how much she's hurting, and not be able to do anything about it. It takes time, and soon she will be right as rain. But in the mean time, my heart still hurts for her. Asking for space from those who are concerned about you is a difficult thing, too. We are problem-solvers, in general, and we like to think that we can help others we love to be happy. In general, this is true - we need each other to buoy our spirits, to provide that synergistic stre...

MONTJOY Thus says my king: Say thou to Harry of England: Though we seemed dead, we did but sleep: advantage is a better soldier than rashness. Tell him we could have rebuked him at Harfleur, but that we thought not good to bruise an injury till it were full ripe: now we speak upon our cue, and our voice is imperial: England shall repent his folly, see his weakness, and admire our sufferance. Bid him therefore consider of his ransom; which must proportion the losses we have borne, the subjects we have lost, the disgrace we have digested; which in weight to re-answer, his pettiness would bow under. For our losses, his exchequer is too poor; for the effusion of our blood, the muster of his kingdom too faint a number; and for our disgrace, his own person, kneeling at our feet, but a weak and worthless satisfaction. To this add defiance: and tell him, for conclusion, he hath betrayed his followers, whose condemnation is pronounced. So far my king and master; so much my ...

11 And he said, Go forth, and stand upon the mount before the Lord. And, behold, the Lord passed by, and a great and strong wind rent the mountains, and brake in pieces the rocks before the Lord; but the Lord was not in the wind: and after the wind an earthquake; but the Lord was not in the earthquake: 12 And after the earthquake a fire; but the Lord was not in the fire: and after the fire a still small voice . 13 And it was so, when Elijah heard it, that he wrapped his face in his mantle, and went out, and stood in the entering in of the cave. And, behold, there came a voice unto him, and said, What doest thou here, Elijah? What doest thou here?

Is there really any such thing? Can one person really ever be truly independent? And why would one want to? Isn't there much to be gained from interaction with others? I don't grind my own wheat. You don't answer questions about zoning requirements. The synergistic energy which stems from close, personal, interaction transcends comprehension. And when it is gone, neglected or abandoned, who can put it back together? What will adequately fill the hole? Anything? Anyone?