Mother's Day Thoughts

I have been blessed to know many incredible women in my life. They have each left an indelible impression on me, and I am indebted to each for the powerful examples they show of integrity, faith, and righteousness.

Women represent the culmination of God’s creation. In the creation process, the divine Master prepared the earth in a well-defined order, beginning with light, then preparing dry land for the subsequent plants to grow, then animals who would need those plants. Once everything was prepared, God introduced Adam into the earth. Knowing that Adam would be incomplete – indeed, all of creation would be incomplete – without a companion and a help meet, God created Eve. Adam and Eve completed each other, and we rejoiced because we now had the opportunity to come and participate in the Plan of Salvation.

We were not surprised by this, however. The pattern of marriage and family relationships is something we were very familiar with. 1 Corinthians 11:11 says:

“neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord.”

Sister Eliza R. Snow, second General President of the Relief Society, wrote:


I had learned to call thee Father,

Thru thy Spirit from on high,

But, until the key of knowledge

Was restored, I knew not why.

In the heav'ns are parents single?

No, the thought makes reason stare!

Truth is reason; truth eternal

Tells me I've a mother there.

When I leave this frail existence,

When I lay this mortal by,

Father, Mother, may I meet you

In your royal courts on high?

Then, at length, when I've completed

All you sent me forth to do,

With your mutual approbation

Let me come and dwell with you.

President Spencer W. Kimball observed: "When we sing that doctrinal hymn and anthem of affection, 'O My Father,’ we get a sense of the ultimate in maternal modesty, of the restrained, queenly elegance of our Heavenly Mother, and knowing how profoundly our mortal mothers have shaped us here, do we suppose her influence on us as individuals to be less if we live so as to return there?" (Ensign, May 1978)

We see in this that man and woman, together supporting, complimenting, sustaining, and supplementing one another is the divinely appointed roles we each have. No one should think they are better – or worse – than the other. We are all in this together, and married couples, in particular, should give everything they have to their spouse, to their marriage. We are to become one, united in love and companionship and faith.

Some men have come to the mistaken conclusion that because they hold the Priesthood, they are in a position higher than women they serve. This is not the case. In an Ensign article, Brother Kocherhans explains:

“The priesthood is “without father, without mother, … having neither beginning of days, nor end of life” (Heb. 7:30), nor maleness nor femaleness. It is head to them both. Male and female alike come under it and must understand their true relationship to it, one to serve as priest within it, the other eventually as a priestess. Men here are given the priesthood power, but both man and woman must bring themselves into submission unto it, rather than she unto him as a person. The man must assume the same relationship of honor and obedience to priesthood truths and doctrines that the woman does. That is, it precedes them both. For the man to assume that because he “holds” the priesthood that it is his or that he is somehow exalted in importance is a serious distortion:

“That they may be conferred upon us, it is true; but when we undertake to cover our sins, or to gratify our pride, our vain ambition, or to exercise control or dominion or compulsion … in any degree of unrighteousness, behold, the heavens withdraw themselves” (D&C 121:37).

There is no chauvinism in true righteousness. It may be that in society generally—among other causes—some male sin spawns some feminist grievances. It especially becomes those bearing the priesthood of the King of Righteousness to grow increasingly Christlike, thus voluntarily eliminating any basis for contention. Justice, fairness, sensitivity, and respect—regardless of another’s sex—reflect the depth and maturity of the commitment of a priesthood bearer.

For a mortal to attempt to use the priesthood without honor and righteousness is to attempt that which even God cannot do. Priesthood bearers must become men of virtue. Men and women alike have this commandment and promise:

“Let thy bowels also be full of charity towards all men, and to the household of faith, and let virtue garnish thy thoughts unceasingly; then shall thy confidence wax strong in the presence of God; and the doctrine of the priesthood shall distil upon thy soul as the dews from heaven.

“The Holy Ghost shall be thy constant companion, and thy scepter an unchanging scepter of righteousness and truth; and thy dominion shall be an everlasting dominion, and without compulsory means it shall flow unto thee forever and ever” (D&C 121:45–46).”

We can see by this that there is no place for sexism or sexist attitudes, even benevolent ones, in the Church. Men and women are equal before God, and more importantly, each relies on the other for strength and power when and where weak. We all struggle, and we all need the help that can only come through having people around us to bear us up.

Righteous, faithful women are able to contribute in many ways, both in the Church and in society. Much has been spoken of regarding women’s divine role as mother, and it is proper and worthy that we do so. Yet we should not ignore the work that has been done by those who – for whatever reason – are not mothers, or who simply choose to follow paths that lead them to different destinations.

All (women), whether or not (they) bear children, can fulfill the role of mother. Sister Patricia T. Holland explained: "In a poignant exchange with God, Adam states that he will call the woman Eve.

And why does he call her Eve? 'Because she [is] the mother of all

living.' (Gen. 3:20; Moses 4:26.) 

"... Eve was given the identity of 'the mother of all living'— years, decades, perhaps centuries before she ever bore a child. It would appear that her motherhood preceded her maternity, just as surely as the perfection of the Garden preceded the struggles of mortality. I believe mother is one of those very carefully chosen words, one of those rich words— with meaning after meaning after meaning. We must not, at all costs, let that word divide us. I believe with all my heart that it is first and foremost a statement about our nature, not a head count of our children.

" . . . Some women give birth and raise children but never 'mother' them. Others, whom I love with all my heart, 'mother' all their lives but have never given birth. And all of us are Eve's daughters, whether we are married or single, maternal or barren. We are created in the image of the Gods to become gods and goddesses" (" 'One Thing Needful': Becoming Women of Greater Faith in Christ," Ensign, Oct. 1987, pp. 32-33).

President Brigham Young said:

I can say to the sisters, if you have superior talents, arise and let your light shine. Prove to your neighbors and the community that you are capable…

As I have often told my sisters in the Female Relief Societies, we have sisters here who, if they had the privilege of studying, would make just as good mathematicians or accountants as any man; and we think they ought to have the privilege to study these branches of knowledge that they may develop the powers with which they are endowed. We believe that women are useful not only to sweep houses, wash dishes, make beds, and raise babies, but that they should stand behind the counter, study law or physic [medicine], or become good book-keepers and be able to do the business in any counting house, and this to enlarge their sphere of usefulness for the benefit of society at large. (Teachings of Brigham Young, Chapter 19).

Sister Sheri Dew is one of my personal favorite examples of this. She is an author, publisher, and is currently the president and CEO of Deseret Book. Her contributions to women – not just LDS women, but women in general – are profound.

Another of my favorites is Sister Martha Cannon. She was a schoolteacher, chemist, and practicing medical doctor, before embarking on a notable political career. A Democrat who was the first woman elected to a state Senate in the United States, defeating her own Republican husband who ran against her. She said:

You give me a woman who thinks about something besides cook stoves and wash tubs and baby flannels, and I'll show you, nine times out of ten, a successful mother.

(This from a woman who raised ten (!) children and buried three husbands!)

I am also grateful for those women who juggle many different priorities. We live in a world where women are put in positions – often of necessity – to work outside the home to help provide for the family’s finances. Women seem to rise to the occasion, however.

In closing, I would like to relate the words of President Hinckley, speaking to Relief Society members gathered for General Conference in October 2000:

Your hearts are all of one kind. You are gathered together because you love the Lord. You have a testimony and conviction concerning His living reality. You pray unto the Father in Jesus’ name. You understand the efficacy of prayer. You are wives and mothers. You are widows and single mothers carrying very heavy burdens. You are newly married women, and you are women who have not married. You are a vast concourse of women of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. You belong to this great organization, more than four million of you. No one can calculate the tremendous force for good that you can become. You are the keepers of the hearth. You are the managers of the home. Along with Sister Dew, I charge you to stand tall and be strong in defense of those great virtues which have been the backbone of our social progress. When you are united, your power is limitless. You can accomplish anything you wish to accomplish. And oh, how very, very great is the need for you in a world of crumbling values where the adversary seems so very much to be in control.

I have great respect and admiration for you young women who have come into the Society rather recently. You have largely weathered the storm that beat about you in your youth. You have kept yourself unsullied from the world. You have kept yourself free from the taints and stains of unrighteousness. You are the very flower of the good, maturing youth of the Church. You have made it thus far, clean and beautiful and virtuous. I compliment you most warmly.

I commend you women who are single. You have known much of loneliness. You have known anxiety and fear and desperate longing. But you have not let this overcome you. You have gone forward with your lives, making significant and wonderful contributions along the way. God bless you, my dear sisters and friends. (Pres. Gordon B. Hinckley, October 2000 General Conference, RS Session)