The Sublime Roundabout

or, who would win in a cage fight - Adam or Charles Darwin? Sometimes my son and I have incredible conversations. They're very satisfying and enlightening, and I love that I get insights into the way he thinks. It's (perhaps not surprisingly) similar to my own way of thinking, but different enough to be interesting and frequently surprising. So last night we were watching this: Bill Nye - Ken Ham Debate (note - you can skip the first 13 minutes [there's a timer counting down]. I am not sure why that's there, but there's no content other than the countdown.) It's VERY LONG, but worth it. Truly. Do not skip things or you  may miss something you'd like. Now, I love Bill Nye - have for years. The guy is entertaining and informative without being too jokey or preachy. He's like everyone's favorite college professor or high school science teacher. I love that he wears bow ties. I love that he has such an incredible zest for life. One thing I didn...

Went to Utah this weekend. It was awesome to see most of my siblings. They're such amazing people, and I'm grateful to be associate with such high-caliber people. Truly. But the BEST THING EVER was to spend time with my sweet girl. Elise is the best road trip partner - she never (!) complained and was just patient and sweet the whole time. She didn't even gripe about my old man music. ;) Here's a pic or two from the trip - This is the snowy Oregon road through the Cascades. It was a bit hairy in a couple of spots on the way there, but the way back was dry and clear. This particular shot is on OR 140 near Lake of the Woods. It was incredibly lovely.  This is my sweets. She'd been driving since 7 AM with me, and she still has the energy to smile. What a trooper! And yes, she really is that pretty in real life, too.  No trip to Utah is complete without stopping at Crown Burger/Apollo Burger. Such deliciousness. Elise was unfortunately not a fan...

How do you over come the loss of your best friend? How can you feel whole without a heart beating in your chest? How can you withstand the arctic winds of life when the flame the brought you such warmth and light and joy is gone, ruthlessly ripped from your life in front of your very eyes? Those fine, golden tendrils of light that bound two souls together, how can they be removed without devastating injury? And who can know the anguish that attends having to experience it twice? I thought about her for days. I remembered how she smiled when she woke in the morning, looking into my eyes from her pillow. It was a secret, sweet smile that was meant for only me. I remembered the feel of her soft, small hand on my chest as she lay with her head on my shoulder, my arm around her. She was so small compared to me. So small. She never needed my protection - she was always strong and capable and independent - but at those moments I would feel that latent male urge to protect and defend. And...

Janice stood there blinking, looking in turns at John, Rick, Michael... She couldn't bear to look at her children, couldn't bear the shocked look in Adam's eyes she knew would be there. Inside her, it was like something had melted. Something that she didn't even know was solid had given way. Her insides felt as though she were filled with some kind of gelatin, and everything on which she'd based her whole existence was thrown out of focus. Shaky and unsure and tenuous. She felt herself falling, falling... She almost envied the dead man at her feet. She turned to Rick, her father, the man she'd grown up - not really loving, but surely learning from. She said, "We need to get out of here. This whole operation has been compromised." Rick said, "Where should we go? There are a number of safe houses..." Janice said, "Which one is closest?" "There's an apartment just outside of Mesquite." "Perfect. How do ...

The explosion shocked me. The hive of activity before me, lit by a few sputtering emergency lights, quickly became darkened as smoke filled the room. The sound of gunfire popped through the darkness, and I pulled Adam down, down to the floor. We started crawling for some kind of concealment. In the dim light, we could only make out rough outlines of shapes, shapes of men running past, shapes of larger objects we could only guess at, shapes of things that had been so familiar just a few moments ago, but which now took on a strange, otherworldly quality that was disorienting. Adam tugged me over to the side. We were behind a pallet that looked to be stacked with some kind of books. It is always interesting to me that when in those kinds of circumstances, we become hyper-attenuated to the finest details of our surroundings. I could smell the sulfur in the smoke, for example, acrid and biting. I could see the screws they used to bind the books together, noting that they were s...

E'en the winter cold Releases its grasp, slowly Giving way to spring